i feel like everytime i take a step forward i take ten steps backwards.
the car. the fam. the job. money. niggas. the same situations that were fucked up a year ago are worse off today.
the only good thing right now is school. i found out what i need to do to get money from fafsa. i dicided to go to brenau in gainesville. its cool.
i met up wit d one night but 2 months ago we started talkin again and started talkin that bull. i guess he got the point and he stopped callin. a married man tried to talk to me and a nigga from candler road, they were both on some bull. margo tryin to get me to call mike and richie cause i aint had sex in bout 4 months. but im cool on that tip. but there was a point in time when i wasnt i even calld brandons ass over. but he didnt didnt get over here when he was suppose too so i told him nevermind. ive been thinkin bout holdin off on sex for a while but no one seems to believe me.anyway i went to stripjoint and get a show from a stripper one who was eyein me and shit even came over to me when he got down but i was to dumb to see it. my auntie pointed the shit out to me that next day. i got a hug from him and a rose. i got a lil tipsy and shit. i had fun and im goin back for my birthday. one stripper was from dtown. i told him i was from flint and he asked me what high school i went too i forgot. that shit was sad. but hopefully ole boy will be there but i aint gettin my hopes up.
i made up my mind and decided to go away for my birthday. im goin to visit kenny for a few days in az. he was gone pay for my ticket but its damn near 400 so i told him we could go half. i cant wait hopefully ill come back wit a new "attitudte" and shit like that.
i talked to my brother and he goin through some shit too. and dience. i cant believe how we done hit hard times. makes me wonder if flint got a hold on us even when we miles and miles away. speakin of flint i talked to this nigga i hadnt spoke to in a min, like 4 years. he caught me up a few folks but i really didnt care. and i feel kinda sad cause these is the folks i damn near grew up wit. but then i think about the way the shitted on my and i say fuck it. people in the "nieghborhood" dont talk to us at all since that nigga left. so i feel like i got a right to be rude to em. and i am every chance i get. but you no i never liked these niggas anyway. kenneth even on the bullshit. just fuckin screwed my like all outdoors.
but yup i just keep on fallin deeper and deeper.........
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