I’m pretty sure that I’ll end up opening a hornets nest with this one, but I saw SecretHuggers entry yesterday (here) and thought I’d ‘wade in’ so to speak, and give our thoughts as admins.
A while ago I wrote a pretty nasty letter to the ‘secret hug team’ requesting that they desist from their activities. I wrote this because it looked to me like there was some sort of HTML webcrawler bot going around and leaving random hugs.
I got a friendly mail in reply, explaining that it was real people behind the SecretHuggers and that if people didn’t want to be hugged, they could ban SecretHugger username, because SecretHugger couldn’t (and I agree) be expected to rememeber all the people who had requested it.
So… Whilst I agree with a number of comments made on that entry that some people, particularly people who are, or were, abused children and would not want, or did not feel safe to be hugged by a stranger. I would like to say though, that please, if this is the case, ban the SecretHugger user from adding comments. It is NOT a ban in the traditional sense, it is simply a sign to the SecretHugger user that you do not wish to be hugged. You are not being insensitive, or ‘a bad person’ as someone put it. Indeed quite the reverse. By banning SecretHugger from hugging you, you are giving EVERYONE ELSE A CHOICE. You give yourselves a choice too because you may later choose that its OK for SecretHugger to hug you, as you ‘get to know them’.
I’ve read the SecretHugger diary, its warm. Its nicely laid out. There’s a lot of effort been put into it, and its not a diary thats there to ‘review’ other diarists or put them down. Quite the reverse.
We ask SecretHugger to stay, and to keep doing what she’s doing. If you don’t want her to hug you in your diary, please use the Ban User feature of the comments system. They won’t take it personally and you’re excercising your God given right of free choice. Please let others excercise theirs by allowing Secret Hugger to continue.
Steve and Matt.