Those who would parody. Or mention other diarists.
Sun Jul 15 2001

We've had enough. No really, enough now. This whole parody lark with various different users pretending to be different people and third persons getting in on the fights and such like is getting just too difficult for our tiny heads to keep up with, and to be frank, why the hell should we?

We are therefore left with a few options;

1) Public diaries must be Premium Accounts. At least then we'd be getting paid to look after the kindergarten.
2) Close the site completely cos at the moment its not much more than a thorn in our sides.
3) Open the site completely and say its a free for all. (Much like all the other diary sites out there). This would mean we quit responding to 'abuse' type emails unless they come from a lawyer, and since the US privacy laws and recent case law indicate that we don't have to give out details even then, probably we wouldn't bother.
4) Tighten the line and simply delete without warning any diary entry that references another diarist whether directly or indirectly if it gets complained about.

Beware the double edged sword of number 4, since even the more innocent amongst you risk losing entries.

Number 5, of course, which doesn't even bear mentioning in the list because its so unlikely to ever happen and that is that everyone grows the hell up. To be fair though again its only a few who aren't grown up sucking in the rest.

You all read the terms and conditions before you sign up. You all know identifying other diarists or real people isn't allowed. Yet still you write parody entries, and make insane references to other people whether or not they should be dragged into anything.

Go change your nappies people. We're not putting up with it any more. We haven't decided which option we're going for yet, but I am scheduling a meeting with Matt and Les to decide. Incidentally, it was Matt that SMS'd me this morning to suggest option 1 because its HIM that pissed off with the minority who make it bad for the majority. So well done guys, you got to Mr Placid as well. I never knew anyone less flappable than Matt, but you succeeded. Congrats.

Steve.

20 Comments
  • From:
    Sobriquet (Legacy)
    On:
    Sun Jul 15 2001
    hmm..I don't quite know what to say...
    I'm sorry it's come to a decision like this..
    is it really about the money..or is it about the childish games?
    ..if it's soley about the parodies..then maybe you can attach a program that reports the diary users IP number for everyone to see.
    soon parody diaries will be identified ..as will multiple diaries..
    *shrug*
    just a suggestion.
    I personally wouldn't like to see the diary become a pay only site..
    this is from a selfish position..
    I don't have the money to pay for it.. :(
    anyway...
    obviously the decision is yours to make..
  • From:
    Serenity (Legacy)
    On:
    Sun Jul 15 2001
    This is just a suggestion. I agree that this is ridiculous. So what if you did this???

    Make it so that anyone who has more than one diary has to either state in their diaries what their usernames are, or else make one of them private?? Like for example, lets say that there are 2 deardiary admin diaries, a 1 and a 2. deardiary1 has to put something on the menu bar that they are also deardiary2 and vice versa, or make on of them private???

    I don't know if that would help, just trying to find a way to "stop the madness!!!"
    _\m/
  • From:
    CastleMistress (Legacy)
    On:
    Sun Jul 15 2001
    All those options sound a little too drastic for me, I think the best option is to just delete the offending person's account, and ban them from using DD, there are ways to do that, so that they can't click on anyone's diary comments button to try to leave messages, via cookies, or whatever.
    I know in a lot of chat rooms, they can trace offensive people by ip addy, and immediately lock them out by way of a cookie.
    Too bad there is not a way to get everyone who comes to leave a comment to have to fill out a form first with a valid e-mail address , name and password... then they can leave comments. Send an email to them to confirm who they are,and from there, anytime they want to leave a comment, they must sign in with their username and password!
    No one can annonymously leave messages then, and you can block them later if you need to.
    Better to block the babies, until they learn to grow up some, than to punish everyone .
    By the way, thank you guys for e-mailing back so quickly, and also , I just got my first SQL & PL/SQL certification! (4 more to go!)
    ;)
    ~CM~
  • From:
    Buggie (Legacy)
    On:
    Sun Jul 15 2001
    K i didn't understand the second entry...
    But...

    *stands up an applauds the first one*

    I am sorry it has come to this :o(
    Why can't ppl just get along...
    An if they can't do that...
    Then quit slanderin others?
    Is that so hard to do?
    An r the rules so hard to understand?
    I don't think so!

    *snuggles for a kewl team*

    Buggie
  • From:
    Tinoz (Legacy)
    On:
    Sun Jul 15 2001
    *agress with castle mistress* Why let a few of the bad apples spoil the bunch. Maybe the first offense, 3 days block. Second time ban. Up to you. That way people would know your serious, yet you wouldn't be hurting us that are minding are owns. And on the second entry, wow, only 15 bucks. LOt of impressions though. Anywho, hope you admins come up with something that won't hurt the rest of us. Best wishes, bye.
  • From:
    NooNoo (Legacy)
    On:
    Sun Jul 15 2001
    Or maybe you should do another diary category: Assholes & co. into which all the diaries that are about flaming other writers would be automatically moved. Ha!
  • From:
    Sobriquet (Legacy)
    On:
    Sun Jul 15 2001
    that's fair enough, I think! :)
  • From:
    Serenity (Legacy)
    On:
    Sun Jul 15 2001
    Ok, that sounds fair. What about those diarists that don't use names? how will you determine what is abuse??
  • From:
    Starcrossed (Legacy)
    On:
    Sun Jul 15 2001
    I really don't have any answers, computer illiterate as I am, lol. I'm just sorry that you all have had to deal with this mess. I'm not one to talk negative about any diarist but admit to using diarist's names thanking them for a kind word or something to that effect in my diary. I would hate for someone to complain about me if I've spoken kindly of them, but I guess that could happen to, you never know about people these days. You all have told us to get permission from the diarists regardless of what our intentions are and we've failed to do that (me included, I'm sorry to say). From this day on though, you won't need to worry about this diarist's using anyone's name without their permission. Anyway, I hate that you've had to resort to this but I think something needed to be done. Whether or not it's the right route to take, I don't know, but I appauld your decision myself.

    Star
  • From:
    Menana (Legacy)
    On:
    Sun Jul 15 2001
    Thank you for watching out for the good guy's at DD. I think you guy's chose the best option and you are great. Have a great rest of the weekend.
  • From:
    Cutypops (Legacy)
    On:
    Sun Jul 15 2001
    Hi Guys!
    I did leave some comments on one of the diaries the other day which was taking the p*** out of the rest of us. They mentioned people who i communicate with, and I was so angry!

    Since I left two comments on there, no one else has written anymore and no more diary entries have appeared!

    Only caught up with this Sunday, as I've been away, as my regular readers will know!

    We can do without people like this on the system.

    Cutypops
  • From:
    Silent (Legacy)
    On:
    Sun Jul 15 2001
    i agree with noo noo!

    lol..actually, i think that just deleting flaming entries is a good idea..i know that usually when i write a entry like that (kinda like yesterday!) i do it in anger and after a few hours i delete it anyway.

    well..i hope you guys can calm down now..take care

    sarah
  • From:
    Marcella (Legacy)
    On:
    Sun Jul 15 2001
    Hmmm..

    What about those of us who address an entry to certain other diarist but it isn't in a bad way? Or even just answering someone's comments with information?

    I'm hoping this option doesn't include that at all.

    -M.
  • From:
    Atlas (Legacy)
    On:
    Sun Jul 15 2001
    What if I just hate someone? Can I email the abuse address and demand that you remove their diary and/or take them to court and prosecute them?

    Would you even read the email or would you just delete my diary immediately?
  • From:
    Softheart (Legacy)
    On:
    Sun Jul 15 2001
    Don't blame you a bit. I don't follow any of that bullshit myself, when I am referencing anyone else it is in a kind way for instance today thanking someone for their ideas on home improvement. You have gotten "drawn in" by this crap. Remember the Serenity Prayer. Don't worry so much about other people's worries, just do what you can and don't allow it to get to you. You have control over that portion - step back a bit and take a deep breathe. Life's too short for that stuff. If people's feelings are getting hurt, well I say it's their problem and not yours. Yours is putting the site up and managing it and you are doing a wonderful job of it.
  • From:
    Flagg (Legacy)
    On:
    Mon Jul 16 2001
    hm. i would have opted for #3, but whatever, its a free service, i'll take what i can get.
    snot like i get involved in these stupidities anyway.
  • From:
    Eclectic Warrior (Unauthenticated) (Legacy)
    On:
    Mon Jul 16 2001
    There are many of us that use this web site quietly and in our own way. I would guess there is a small minority of people who are linked through this site and they are the ones whose diaries are most popular.
    I would hate to see this site dissapear because of a few kids who couldnt keep it in their pants.
    I vote for just deleting their diaries and thats that.

  • From:
    Psyche (Legacy)
    On:
    Mon Jul 16 2001
    Dear Les, Matt and Steve,

    I'm sorry to know that the situation here has driven even Matt so far up the wall that he's pissed off. I'm surprised by this post because until I read the entry from Buggie's diary today, I had no idea that any of this type of stuff was going on. Parody diaries of real diaries and otherwise - that's really going out of your way to hurt and venge yourself on another person. I guess that the more precautions we've installed - like blocking comments and requiring usernames to leave comments and such - people have found ways to get around that and still pursue their adversary.

    I like and respect all of you who run dear diary, and thus I wish that I could say I think that option 4 is going to be the right one, but I do not. I can see it causing you a lot more anguish than it solves. I have written about, in my time, a certain person who was the center of my world, my thoughts and otherwise for a long period of time, and in the long run I found out that I didn't like him very much. He was a friend and lover, and I talked about him because he was critical to my life. Let's say that he creates a diary here, and then complains that I am writing about him and I am not allowed to write about another diarist on dear diary? If I write about my Mother, and she creates a diary and doesn't want me to have any entries that mention her - will those all be erased? How can someone keep a diary and *not* talk about their Mothers?

    Or let's say that I made a reference to another diarist 10 months ago in my diary and now, with this new law, he wants that old entry deleted to enforce the new rule. You could have a lot of problems, going through the erasing entries because someone out there is offended.

    Personally, I think that you have to control the site as best you can, and I'm very sorry that its become such an ordeal for you. However, I didn't even know this was happening, and I'm sure there are many other people who use this service who have no idea about the abuse that's happening and find it very confusing and, I'm sad to say, <b>insulting</b> to be called spoken to in the way of the posts above. I am not a child who needs someone to change my nappies, and most of the people who use this service aren't. If you could spare the tone and the insults for those of us who don't create parody diaries or abuse the system, we'd appreciate it.

    I use Dear Diary as its supposed to be used, I am certainly not a whiney and complainy customer of yours, and I pay for the service because I enjoy it and appreciate your hard work and want the site to be continue. However, I am not comfortable with overt censorship. If I read another person's diary, and it makes me think of something, then I might mention them when I write my own entry. If someone doesn't want this to happen, then all the diaries should be private anyway, so we don't read about and become involved in each others lives. Or even just mildly interested in each others lives.

    The tantalition of Dear Diary is taht you can read another person's diary and peek into their private lives. The diaries are made public, so there's a subtle invitation into reading them. And obviously people should treat other's diaries with respect. I know taht hasn't always happened to me, because there are punks out there who like to say mean things or otherwise, or they get their jollies out of anonymously creating chaos online. However, if people are not going to be inspired by, interested in, moved or otherwise curious and involved in another diarists lives - the only way to accomplish that is to make the diaries themselves private, which would defeat the purpose of the site.

    My favorite option - find the idiots, the theives and the law breakers and put them in jail. Remove them from the mess. See if it gets better. Like others have suggested, you can block people from this site. I would prefer it if you used your own judgement and deleted the accounts of people who are obviously using their diaries or dear diary accounts to attack, hurt or make fun of the real users rather than threaten to remove dear diary even from those of us who love and pay for the service.

    - Psyche
  • From:
    Kaliko88 (Legacy)
    On:
    Tue Jul 17 2001
    Um, this is probably a stupid idea, but someone once mentioned that a lot of the rotten-apple-gang seem to be doing these parody diaries and flame fests to get in the top 10. May the top 10 thing should be discontinued? Less of a temptation then.
  • From:
    Firefly4885 (Legacy)
    On:
    Sun Jul 22 2001
    What if one of my friends had a diary, and we wanted to write about each other, but using our diary names? Like me and this other diarist...