My supervisor has a doctor’s appointment, and left me (again) with no assignment. I have no regular tasks I am to perform. I generally just do what she tells me to 2 minutes after she tells me what it is. Sometimes it takes longer for her to explain it than it does for me to do it. Then I need something else to do. And we start all over again.
I think I am going to go slap out of my mind sometimes.
So here I am being paid 9.29 an hour to write in my journal.
Wait a minute. ….
Does this mean?
COULD it mean?
That AT LAST I am a professional writer? I am getting PAID to write ?
Somebody break out the champaign ! . . . wait a minute, I don’t like champaign.
Break out the Strawberry Soda. Open the ’73, shoot, let’s celebrate!
In other news, I have been working on a story like crazy lately. I know it’s in response to feeling out of control. Writing like a crazy woman. Like our Queen of Norway. Anyway, I was getting ready for work this morning and thought of a humorous line in a description I was working out in my head. But by the time I sat down for a few minutes to write about half an hour later, it had completely left me. Gone. And for the life of me I can’t get it back. I MUST get into the habit of writing that stuff down RIGHT away, or poof ! Vapor.
I am feeling quite guilty at the moment. But I am trying to get over it. Now if I had actual responsibilities, I would be rightly called a royal goof off. But what am I to do when I am the lowest person on the food chain who has been left to her own devices?
Do you think I am losing my mind? Writing all the time like this….? ( You lucky duck, I just skipped over two closely written sheets, thus sparing you the agony of my psychosis )
My more generous self answers:
No, I don’t think you are losing your mind and I will tell you why. If you were at home right now you would be whipping up a batch of sourdough starter to make bread. Cleaning up your garden and picking green beans for dinner. Throwing something into the crock pot to have with the sourdough bread. You would be organizing recipes and doing laundry and have a gourd project going. These are all tangible, rewarding, introvert nurturing activities.
You probably would write less and maybe it would be more polished. But this…. This is Survival writing. Write or Go Insane. Those are your choices.
You chose wisely.
This is just your coping mechanism. You would probably do the same in any number of stressful conditions.
Ya think?
I think.
Sigh. I sure hope you’re right.