D'vorahDavida
Yetzirah

Commentary
Thu Mar 31 2005

I write this after just finding out that Terri Schiavo has died.

After listening to dozens of conversations about this situationover the last many weeks, I have come to a few conclusions. Things I thought I was sure of, I found out I wasn’t. Positions I formerly took, have been changed. I have become more disillusioned with our courts. Do I think I am in possession of the definitive answers to all the questions raised by this situation? Nope. But here are some thoughts in no particular order of importance.

1.Using this woman’s circumstance as an example of end of life issues was flawed. Everyone agrees that taking extraordinary measures in keeping someone alive can fall into the cruel and unusual treatment area real quick. But this was not the case for her. She only had a feeding tube. No respirator, no continual dialysis or any number of other incredibly invasive medical tools available to us today. Using her case as a springboard for support of euthanasia is ludicrous. Though I did hear people doing that.

2. The courts are not the final arbiters of ethical behavior. They are hopelessly flawed in favor or against certain philosophies. Some judges have lost their way and insisting on the removal of the ten commandments from certain courtrooms proves this. We are not in possession of any inherent moral, ethical or legal impulses divorced from the great principles given to us by God. As examples: It was legal to own slaves in America at one time, it was legal to make black people use separate bathrooms, lunch counters and theaters, it is legal to have an abortion WELL past the first trimester, some people want to make it legal to kill terminally ill people. None of these things are ethical or moral, but they were, or may become, legal.

3. The fact that Terri’s husband hindered her parents from being with her near the end of her life, OR to be given her body to bury as they wish, proves to me that he is a miserable human being.

4. Everyone has been saying we should all have an advance directive signed and sealed in case these issues arise in our own lives. I read one of those forms a few days ago, and found that document in no way is complete enough for me. There are HUGE areas left open for interpretation by others, and in my opinion it is not clear enough to assure your relatives will not have to make some hard choices. I found that I could not in good conscience check any of the boxes on that form. Oh, yes, there is a place for you to write your own directions. But the array of possible scenarios that could occur at the end of my life, left me at a loss for words. I had no idea what I would write in there.

5. These choices would be a lot fewer if we always erred on the side of life….or death as the case may be for you. But we do not have consensus, because we don’t have clarity on what should be uppermost. Our needs, or the needs of the infirm.

6. Just because it is inconvenient to have people in Terri’s condition around, this is not reason enough to refuse her sustenance. Though we COULD have a long and complicated conversation about hooking people up to ventilators. Food is one thing, air is another. If you can’t swallow, this does not mean you should be given up on. Ummm, the POPE is using a feeding tube at the moment. If you can’t breathe, well this is another thing altogether.

7. I used to think I knew what I thought about these end of life issues. I really did. Now I am not so sure. I think I have jumped the fence into a more life affirming place than I was before.

8. There is an assumption that I heard someone say on television …. He said something like, “…. Everybody agrees that the “real” person is in the mind, and if the mind is gone, then they are gone.” This makes perfect sense if you are an atheist. But it makes no sense to me. I think that the “real” person resides in the soul, which resides in a body (in this world) and as long as the soul is present in this world, it can effect all the worlds. We should be very careful who we usher through the gates of death before time. These things really SHOULD be left in the hands of God as much as is possible.

9. Because of the incredible advances of medical interventions, we are able to save people that otherwise would most certainly have died. In the case of accident or illness, these tools are a wonderful blessing. But we also are able to use these same interventions to prolong life under questionable circumstances. Again, I don’t think Terri fell under this category. A feeding tube is a pretty rudimentary intervention. However because of our advances, we have created dilemmas for ourselves that stretch our moral and ethical values to their absolute breaking point.

10. If we as a society take the position that people like Terri are just too damn much trouble, just remember, that you are going to get old and decrepit one day too. Make sure that the measures that you SAY you support are ones you want to be applied to you. And you better take into consideration the “drift” factor. When abortion first became legal, it was only permitted in the first trimester. Now they can stick an instrument into the brain of a baby in the womb, kill it and then deliver it. I don’t THINK anything of that nature was ever DREAMED of by the courts back in the 70’s. So if you sign your “advance directive” today, the criteria for the phrases “vegetative state” and “terminally ill” may have very different meanings 30 years from now.

11. There are worse things than being in a body that has betrayed you. And that is living in a society who will turn on you at the first sign of infirmity. "Oh, you need dialysis? Do you know how much that COSTS? It would really be in our best interests if you just check out now okay? Sign here please, there’s a good citizen."

12.I do believe that if the person is conscious and refuses any medical treatment, we should get out of the way, and give them care and comfort with great compassion.

13.Which brings me to the final observation. A society that kills its unborn and its infirm will never learn true compassion. And a society without compassion will fall.

I realize that all of the above is certainly debatable, and we should debate it, long and hard. But I’ll tell you, the truest and best answers to these questions will not be made on a television program that craves sound bites and simplistic presentations with nice neat conclusions. We need to find another way to address these things, far from the car and shampoo commercials. It is too important for such a frivolous venue.

There is a prayer that is said in Judaism when you hear of someone’s death. It goes like this:

Baruch ata Adoni, dayan emet.

Which means, Blessed are You Lord, true judge.

The assumption is that God decided when it was someone’s time to die, and we bow to His higher knowledge. But for the first time, I saw this prayer in a new light.

Perhaps in this case, it is we, our society, that God will have to judge.

May He show us mercy.


6 Comments
  • From:
    Dreamerbooks2003 (Legacy)
    On:
    Thu Mar 31 2005
    I struggled with the soul issue also. I have thought of life as being mind.. you do have a point.
    However you say food is different from air...??
    She had been on feeding tube.. tied to the bed.. unable to respond for over 15 yrs..That is so long.. Fifteen years!!!

    Starving her to death was cruel.

    I don't have all the answers, but I am so glad the woman is finally at peace...

    The living wills are many times not followed even after signed. They are no guarantee that your wishes will be carried out even if you have a living will. I know people who have been through this with relatives..
    It is sad..
    that media and court system used her is sad .

    In the end.
    I feel for her family.. and the husband.. He was used also. I don't think he blocked them (parents) access, but they just didn't make it to her bedside on time.
    I know we don't have all the facts and the TV is not the place to get the facts. Every station has it's agenda.. We saw that in the past election.

    I do agree with you may G-d show us mercy..May He show us all mercy.












  • From:
    Sezrah (Legacy)
    On:
    Thu Mar 31 2005
    excellent. bravo. i absolutely agree, especially with point #13

    shame on us as a society

  • From:
    Jamisinc (Legacy)
    On:
    Thu Mar 31 2005
    May He show us more mercy than we, as a nation, showed Terri.
    Amen
  • From:
    InStitches (Legacy)
    On:
    Thu Mar 31 2005
    You said everything I was feeling and thinking but just could not put into words this morning. Thank you and God bless you.
  • From:
    AQuietEvening (Legacy)
    On:
    Thu Mar 31 2005
    I too have jumped from one side of this issue to the other for so many of the same reasons that you stated that I think it would be wonderful to grab my knitting needles and spend an afternoon with you.

    My husband and I have often told each other to pull the plug when there is no hope and I think we both are in agreement as to what that means. But as you have noted there are so many grey areas. I would hate to be a burden on my family and I cannot imagine living as Terry lived. I would want my husband to go on and have a life without me... but I do not believe in suicide and I do not know what God has in mind for me.

    Many people may look at Terry's life and wonder what she had to live for at the end. Maybe we don't know what her purpose was, but I think we have all been touched by her life and her death. We have had to confront difficult issues. We have discussed them with our loved ones and strangers. I think her life impacted far more people than I will have the opportunity to influence in my lifetime. Does that not prove that her life still had a purpose?

    I would much rather err on the side of life than to contribute to someone's death.

    ~QE
  • From:
    Ichandra (Legacy)
    On:
    Thu Mar 31 2005
    hey mon amie you have some very beautiful ideas in this post that have a lot of humanity in them
    have a beautiful day
    love
    ichandra