Why do I write…
it may seems as if I’m preaching common values, teaching the well-known truths, trying to show off plagiarised wisdom or pretend to be “intellectual” smart ass…well, to be honest I don’t really care how it seems. Yes, I do write well-known ideas…because this is the way I choose to learn them, to make them my religion, to say it aloud so that I can believe in it myself. I write not for anybody, not to help anyone other then myself. In truth, I’m no wise nor sensible when it comes to my own issues. I might give advises freely, but we do know that it is in thousand times easier to give advise then to follow it. And in the most of times I’m occupied fixing broken fences, destroyed sand castles, drying off tears in my own world…It is in my habit to leave them all in private places, then find something to hold on to and come here to recite the mantra. Not teaching others, but learning myself. It was always the easiest way to learn…when in need to remember something important, find a thread, say it once, say it twice, repeat it, repeat it until it is imprinted into your brain, stamped on your forehead…hammer her in, if needed, push with force, trample in…until you’ll learn…until the time when she becomes your own idea…that’s why I write.
It is being said ...
that we are ourselves only deep within. That it takes a special someone to come with the keys and let us out. While I can see this happening everywhere in humanland, I also believe that we can be responsible for being self…well…ourselves. In truth, if there is nothing much to hide within, there is nothing much to open either. And when we are full of surprises, why would we wish to hide them? I’ve got to look into myself and find something to be amazed. I’ve got to find something I can love myself for, respect self and value self. I have to see myself interesting. This is an exercise in self-esteem. If I would only hate me, despise me, pity me, see only incomplete part of me, how can I expect others to see me differently? What we project into others as an image of us, it is how we see us or how we wish to see us. Any false details and lies will get stripped eventually, not only because the others will find out the truth, but also because it is difficult to be convincing when you don’t believe yourself. Sharing your secrets is telling your life’s details. Sharing yourself is opening your soul. Many people are after the first, rare people want the latter. I wonder why we are so superficial…
I change
something within me, that’s how I keep myself moving. If I’m the same old me for a long time, I get bored with myself. When I get bored with myself, I imagine, I become a boring person for everyone else. When I sense I might be boring, I feel unsatisfied. When I feel unsatisfied, I tend to turn nasty, moody and arrogant…we can’t be a nice people when we don’t fancy self. When such times arrive, I prefer to take a deep breath, shake off uncomforts and find something else I can do to change things.
It is easy
to sit in same puddle of self-pity and wait for the rescue team, but can we afford it? Eventually you realise that even the closest to us unable to give us what we need…what to do then? If you need anything so desperately, create it for yourself. Being independent is almost like being happy. Independent...independent is the key, isn’t it? Tear off the chains of emotions that keep you in captivity and if something doesn’t work for you, find something else.
it may seems as if I’m preaching common values, teaching the well-known truths, trying to show off plagiarised wisdom or pretend to be “intellectual” smart ass…well, to be honest I don’t really care how it seems. Yes, I do write well-known ideas…because this is the way I choose to learn them, to make them my religion, to say it aloud so that I can believe in it myself. I write not for anybody, not to help anyone other then myself. In truth, I’m no wise nor sensible when it comes to my own issues. I might give advises freely, but we do know that it is in thousand times easier to give advise then to follow it. And in the most of times I’m occupied fixing broken fences, destroyed sand castles, drying off tears in my own world…It is in my habit to leave them all in private places, then find something to hold on to and come here to recite the mantra. Not teaching others, but learning myself. It was always the easiest way to learn…when in need to remember something important, find a thread, say it once, say it twice, repeat it, repeat it until it is imprinted into your brain, stamped on your forehead…hammer her in, if needed, push with force, trample in…until you’ll learn…until the time when she becomes your own idea…that’s why I write.
It is being said ...
that we are ourselves only deep within. That it takes a special someone to come with the keys and let us out. While I can see this happening everywhere in humanland, I also believe that we can be responsible for being self…well…ourselves. In truth, if there is nothing much to hide within, there is nothing much to open either. And when we are full of surprises, why would we wish to hide them? I’ve got to look into myself and find something to be amazed. I’ve got to find something I can love myself for, respect self and value self. I have to see myself interesting. This is an exercise in self-esteem. If I would only hate me, despise me, pity me, see only incomplete part of me, how can I expect others to see me differently? What we project into others as an image of us, it is how we see us or how we wish to see us. Any false details and lies will get stripped eventually, not only because the others will find out the truth, but also because it is difficult to be convincing when you don’t believe yourself. Sharing your secrets is telling your life’s details. Sharing yourself is opening your soul. Many people are after the first, rare people want the latter. I wonder why we are so superficial…
I change
something within me, that’s how I keep myself moving. If I’m the same old me for a long time, I get bored with myself. When I get bored with myself, I imagine, I become a boring person for everyone else. When I sense I might be boring, I feel unsatisfied. When I feel unsatisfied, I tend to turn nasty, moody and arrogant…we can’t be a nice people when we don’t fancy self. When such times arrive, I prefer to take a deep breath, shake off uncomforts and find something else I can do to change things.
It is easy
to sit in same puddle of self-pity and wait for the rescue team, but can we afford it? Eventually you realise that even the closest to us unable to give us what we need…what to do then? If you need anything so desperately, create it for yourself. Being independent is almost like being happy. Independent...independent is the key, isn’t it? Tear off the chains of emotions that keep you in captivity and if something doesn’t work for you, find something else.