As we are going through life, we learn things by experience. To each – their own. I believe this is one of the reasons to why we never seems to get everything to be our way. We judge events from our point of view and assume everybody else judge the same. Trying on another’s shoes proved to be a somewhat we never think of before casting off those who don’t play the role we assigned to them. We always think we know better. We always consider us on the right side. And when someone tells us the other side might also be right, we cast the messenger to the same left.
I’ve learned some things as I’m walking my path. Some bitter things, some sweet things. I’ve learned that a perfect stranger can give you a smile and make your day and that a perfect friend can walk away without stating the reason. I’ve learned that a brief encounter can take you off your way and an accidental fellow traveller can show that your way was the wrong one. I’ve learned to listen and to hear, to look and to see, to appreciate everything that being thrown onto me because if it was thrown, I was meant to grasp the lesson…
The most important lesson I consider I’ve learned is that you can change no one. You cannot judge their reasons for doing what they do. You cannot force them to do things differently. You cannot change their heart. You can only answer for your own life, your own mind and your own heart. So many people believe they know better what is better for someone else. So many friends have said to my soon-to-be-ex that it won’t last, that it won’t work, that he’d be better if he stay. I have a sneaky suspicion I was the only one who said: you should go and face your choices. Only then you will know if they were the right ones. Like most of our friends I too think he is making a mistake. But this is not enough for an excuse to make him stay. It has to be in his own mind, his own heart. And I accept. Acceptance is the key to everything. To your peace with the past, to your hopes for the future, to your content in the present. Once you accept it happened, you are free to move on.
And having said all that I want to make a note that although it seems like acceptance should bring a peace of mind and somewhat happiness and all, it only gives you a sense of being free. Free to find your piece of mind, free to find your happiness, free to do anything you want with your life. And I still don’t know where to search, what to do and what do I want…
I’ve learned some things as I’m walking my path. Some bitter things, some sweet things. I’ve learned that a perfect stranger can give you a smile and make your day and that a perfect friend can walk away without stating the reason. I’ve learned that a brief encounter can take you off your way and an accidental fellow traveller can show that your way was the wrong one. I’ve learned to listen and to hear, to look and to see, to appreciate everything that being thrown onto me because if it was thrown, I was meant to grasp the lesson…
The most important lesson I consider I’ve learned is that you can change no one. You cannot judge their reasons for doing what they do. You cannot force them to do things differently. You cannot change their heart. You can only answer for your own life, your own mind and your own heart. So many people believe they know better what is better for someone else. So many friends have said to my soon-to-be-ex that it won’t last, that it won’t work, that he’d be better if he stay. I have a sneaky suspicion I was the only one who said: you should go and face your choices. Only then you will know if they were the right ones. Like most of our friends I too think he is making a mistake. But this is not enough for an excuse to make him stay. It has to be in his own mind, his own heart. And I accept. Acceptance is the key to everything. To your peace with the past, to your hopes for the future, to your content in the present. Once you accept it happened, you are free to move on.
And having said all that I want to make a note that although it seems like acceptance should bring a peace of mind and somewhat happiness and all, it only gives you a sense of being free. Free to find your piece of mind, free to find your happiness, free to do anything you want with your life. And I still don’t know where to search, what to do and what do I want…