I read this thought somewhere: we limit ourselves with the ideas of what we shouldn’t be. We shouldn’t be fabulous, gorgeous, smart and talented because somehow this might make the others around us feel insecure. I’ve noticed the trend about some people: we discuss our miseries, not our achievements. As if competing in who’s got the most miserable life. Oddly it becomes socially awkward to be successful, happy, open-minded, simply - different. Those who do manage to walk with their head high and manifest their success, are seen as “lucky by accident”. It seems as if we are refused the right to be happy “by choice”.
I’ve mentioned this before already, everyone is born a happy child. There are no naturally depressed babies. Unhappiness is learned. Why is that that we afraid to let our child to shine through when we are grown ups? We push him deep inside and told him “Behave. Be quiet, sit still, don’t fidget and do not disrupt your ever important adult from being busy with being depressed.” Who says that it is inappropriate to burst in sudden laugh, to give an unexpected smile to the stranger or to stop in the middle of the road and smell the roses. Who says that you cannot be deeply sad one moment and the next one – indecently happy for no apparent reason, just because you had enough of sadness and now want something different? Enough should really be a powerful switch, that allows us to turn off the bad flow and turn on the good one at our own will. I think, there is not enough appreciation of the power of Enough.
What I discovered from my own experience that even when I have enough, even when I push myself out of miserable place and into the happier place, I still am reluctant to show it “too soon”. What am I afraid of? Why I can confidently fall into depression knowing it will be taken as “this is normal”, but am embarrassed to suddenly become normal in a factual sense of it? As if I have to follow certain "rules of coming out of depression". And if I'd break them, my "normal" won't be a "proper normal". As if I do not trust in a change in a blink of an eye. Honestly, what exactly is there in a logically positive change that I feel uncomfortable about? I wonder if I am afraid to be who I really am because I suspect I can be really awesome, because the potential power scares me and I’m cautious to unleash it, to show what I’m really capable of.
I’ve mentioned this before already, everyone is born a happy child. There are no naturally depressed babies. Unhappiness is learned. Why is that that we afraid to let our child to shine through when we are grown ups? We push him deep inside and told him “Behave. Be quiet, sit still, don’t fidget and do not disrupt your ever important adult from being busy with being depressed.” Who says that it is inappropriate to burst in sudden laugh, to give an unexpected smile to the stranger or to stop in the middle of the road and smell the roses. Who says that you cannot be deeply sad one moment and the next one – indecently happy for no apparent reason, just because you had enough of sadness and now want something different? Enough should really be a powerful switch, that allows us to turn off the bad flow and turn on the good one at our own will. I think, there is not enough appreciation of the power of Enough.
What I discovered from my own experience that even when I have enough, even when I push myself out of miserable place and into the happier place, I still am reluctant to show it “too soon”. What am I afraid of? Why I can confidently fall into depression knowing it will be taken as “this is normal”, but am embarrassed to suddenly become normal in a factual sense of it? As if I have to follow certain "rules of coming out of depression". And if I'd break them, my "normal" won't be a "proper normal". As if I do not trust in a change in a blink of an eye. Honestly, what exactly is there in a logically positive change that I feel uncomfortable about? I wonder if I am afraid to be who I really am because I suspect I can be really awesome, because the potential power scares me and I’m cautious to unleash it, to show what I’m really capable of.