MissTick
Thingish Things

Some thoughts on dealing with our issues I was reminded of how memories of the past, even the good ones can bring us down if only by realisation how final they are. When we no longer have something that meant a lot to us, we tend to fill the space with the ghosts of the memories. The reason people hold on onto memories is because it’s the only thing that doesn’t change. Change frightens us, it takes us out of comfort zone and places into what we perceive as hostile environment. Where we feel vulnerable for we are wading the unfamiliar territories. Ever wondered why we can watch our favourite movies many times? You would think, if you know how it goes, it won’t hold your interest, yet the comfort of the knowing is what pulls us in. Reminders of the past times are what our mind turns to when it is unable to see the new horizons. Mind finds its comfort in watching the same old movie again and again, re-minding the scenes over and over. With the same emotions every time as the emotions have become almost an instinct by now. But no matter how many re-runs, the plot, the ending are always the same. So we get frustrated locked into the loop of looking-for-comfort-unable-to-find-it-in-what-is-not-there-anymore .I’ve heard a joke somewhere: “I’ve watched this movie few times already and have to say that last time the actors played in their best” I’m reminded of my past all the time, I didn’t re-start my life from scratch after what I thought was forever, was gone, the foundation was still there, the walls, the places, the things still the same and every object keeps a print of a hand that touched it, a thought that created it. And I won’t lie and say that these damn reminders have no control over me, they still can press me down easily and occasionally make me cry. The thing is, it is my own choice how I deal with them. No one can hold me strong enough, lift me up high enough to erase my memories and make the pain go away, so with time I’ve just learned the best way that works for me. I ignore the wave when it comes. Simply do nothing about it. Wait it through, like annoying toothache, all the while not letting it to stop me on my way about daily business. It might be the least efficient way of letting go, but it works for me the best. You could say I pretend that there is no pain. And I would agree. Fake it till you’ll make it, I’d say. Now what’s wrong with this concept? Eventually my mind will get used to the idea. And one day I hope to wake up being free from my past. I’m aware that for many the only way to let it go is to vent it out off their system. Be it by thinking of it, talking of it, going through the memories in pictures, visiting special spaces. I will not say that my way is better that their way. But I know that when I’ve tried the other one, it didn’t work for me. I thought, I was letting go, but the more attention I paid to the past, more stronger was its hold on me. As long as the thinking of my past brings emotions, I will avoid thinking of it. It is just not helpful. Only when it won’t matter to me anymore, only then I will be in peace with the memories. I read this somewhere: life is too short to wake up with regrets, so love those who love you, forgive those who hurt you, trust that everything happens for a reason, when given a chance – take it. If it changes your life – let it. Nobody can promise you it’s going to be easy, only that it will be worth it.