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Florida Trip
Wed Sep 12 2001

In maybe an hour at the most, me, T and J will be off to Florida, we are driving down there tonight and then on sunday T and I will be flying back, maybe. I'm not sure with the tradegys that have been going on. I think we will, it'll just be different,.. then what? I wouldn't know, I've never been on a plane.
For the first time since I came to live here, and this is my first time writing in my diary while here,.. I like privacy and they're takinga shower now, if I hear someone coming I'll just push back or something, hopefully save this first. But I am feeling kind of like the first day when I justb got out of school for the first day this year, and just moved stuff out of moms and ada's into here, I was pretty quiet, getting used to all these changes my own way.
Today I have been getting fustrated since they came and got me from school, and we came home and started getting things ready, and I packed some things that I wanted to, but the only thing was, even though I didn't think it was too much, it looked like more then it really wqas and I have done worse with packing, I still had no choice but to take out things. I had to put away the black pair of sandals that I bo8ught myself and wanted for Florida and with an outfit I chose, and the brown pair pf sandals they bought me that look really cute with this one outfit, and make me feel good in well, I only have a black pair of sandlas that will not look good, they may go with, but that doesn't mean they'll look good with that outfit, and I will get tired of wearing these the whole time, even if we are only staying till sunday. I miss smoking but decided for now I'll quit alltyogether, just to quit feeling so damn quilty when I smoike while visiting mom or dad when t and j don't want me to, I'm just being real moody, I think the pshyc. will love this. I'm just cranky, bu5t if I try to explain how I feel today like she wanyts to know next time I see her, how my moods have been each day since last friday, well, she'll jump and put me on some damn medicine, when I really don';t think that'llchange it, everyone get's a little fustrated and stuff, and I'm handling myself JUST FINE.
I'm not yelling or smarting off to T or J, I wasn't happy about every thing I packed having to go back, but I did it, without slamming doors or anything, I just keep telling myself when they're outside and I'm alone for a few minutes, get over it, it's not a big deal, you're being such and ungratful little bitch, don't ruin the trip for them, when they are being so nice to take ou with them. goitta go
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