YouSaidIShouldWriteABook
Blah blah blah

Monday came and went!!!
Tue Jul 25 2000

YYYYEEEEEEEESSSSSS! Today is done! Gone the sun,.... (Taps)
I left work early today, have been feeling worse then yesterday, with a headache, and stomachache, so I slept some and then went to ,eet my new counselor, she's not, though because there's not much she could do but admit me in the hospital but although I have many symptoms for the eating disorder, I'm not very sick right now so they can't. Yes!!! She said she'd love to be my counselor, but she can't, so I'm not sure where we will go from there.
I weigh only 1 pound less then last Friday, but that will change soon, I finally bought some laxatives, I am addicted to them and they help a lot, I take a lot at a time to lose weight and water, it hurts but I don't care if I have to suffer. I just hate needing the laxes so much all of the time!!! It's crazy! Once I took more then 100 at a time, that's the second last time I was in the hospital, and it was FUN. They didn't do anything at first, i was on a medical bed and stayed overnight, just waited to go to another hospital and was released before being admitted AMA, against med. advice because my mom didn't want me to have someone for a counselor.
I'm taking the laxes as soon as I have a day off where I can "afford" to be sick, and go to the restroom A Lot! I keep them like they are powerful or something like they guide me with my life. I just hope I don't stay sick for long!!!
I gotta go, try to sleep a little and go to work tomorrow, take care! Write if you want to!!! I love and appreciate any comments!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thanx,...
2 Comments
  • From:
    Ex-bulimic (Legacy)
    On:
    Tue Jul 25 2000
    citrate of magnesium (available at any drugstore for cheap) does a total system clean out that makes laxatives look like candy. Be careful, have no plans for at least 24 hours after drinking it, and know that it can really screw up your electrolite levels.
  • From:
    Reader (Legacy)
    On:
    Tue Jul 25 2000
    So, ex-bul, you are encouraging this? That is terrible. Strugglingwbulimia, I used to have an eating disorder...it is not as it seems. It will ruin your life and your body. Please seek help. You can take my word for it that there is help out there and there is healing.
    Had I known how much my body was going to get ruined from my eating disorder, I don't think I would have ever gotten so deep into it. I am paying for it now. You are young, you still have a chance to get out and get healty while you can.
    You have to love yourself first or you will NEVER be happy with your body, no matter what size you become.
    --from a concerned reader