The noise fluorescent lights make.
Oh, don’t you dare call it a “hum”. I am not falling for that oversimplification. It’s much more annoying than that. It’s an oscillating sort of “mmmbzzeeoommm” that makes you THINK it’s a hum. A hum, a person could deal with. But it’s that, mmmbzzeeoomm that can cause all sorts of physical and psychological anomalies, the eye twitch being the most common.
There are other forms it can take. One eye becoming larger than the other, (this can be very disconcerting to those who have to look at you). The pulling of ear lobes, pressing of the thumbs into the temples, rubbing the forehead, supposedly to clear one’s thinking, (this never works), and the oh so subtle but persistent, fluorescent light trance. (This can at times be accompanied by drool. If this happens to you, you MUST leave the building for some fresh air and natural light quickly.)
This trance renders a person incapable of stringing more than two thoughts together in a coherent manner. That is why the people at the DMV ARE the way they are. Next time you are there, look up. Yep, fluorescent lights all over the place.
Me, I am like Joe in the movie Joe vs the Volcano. I want my special incandescent light at my desk. A little beacon of hope amid the suspicions that some how, some way, those other lights are sucking the life force from your body, or perhaps trying to get you to hand over your password at Yahoo.
Come out my friends! Into the golden, full spectrum light of the sun.
Clear your muddled brain of the mmmbzzeeoomm trance. String thoughts together freely. Maybe we could all build up an immunity to the fluorescent light disease. Wesley* did it with Iocaine powder, so could we!
I wonder if Aluminum hats would help?
*The Princess Bride
(you MUST see it)