Couldn’t decide if this is a lazy rant or a slow melt or the other way around. So titled with all the options…
Perhaps men aren’t that stupid after all and sometimes accidentally do things that make sense. Take for example remembering birthdays and anniversaries. Indeed, why would anyone need to remember them? What kind of celebration is that? If anyone should celebrate that should be men, not women. Just to think of it: in his youth man has his mom to feed him, clean after him and run his business diary. When man married, he’s got his wife to feed him, clean after him and run his business diary for him. Plus a fringe benefit to the package - sex for free on demand…if he’s smart enough to negotiate, that is. So what exactly changed for a man when he’s got married? Nothing. Why would he need to remember the day it happened? No apparent reason, apparently… Take women on the other hand: once married, they loose their freedom, loose their admirers, loose shape and sometimes mind and generally stop having fun…they’ve got new responsibilities and a bundle(s) of joy on their hands. Of course we do remember the day we signed our slavery contract! What I can’t understand – why celebrate this? It’s the same as when on life sentence, you’d celebrate your first day of prison term… “well done, my dear, you’ve managed to live through yet another year around me…happy anniversary and will you please do something about that laundry - I need a clean shirt…” Honestly, sometimes it is better when they are not around so that they can forget the date and get away with this easily…
OK, forget the men, but I do need another subject to rant on…just because I feel like it today, you know. So I went to buy me a present. Retailer therapy. Which in my case usually achieves completely opposite results. It makes me MAD! In the most mean way as well. So when I was back into the office this afternoon, people learned to hide away off my way. Huh. I didn’t know what to buy. So I bought a bra. I just have to rant about this. Isn’t it ironic, that women do buy bras for the eyes of a man? Who is the most interested in ladies bras? Who can’t help staring at ladies bosoms at every opportunity? Who wants to tuck their women into the most uncomfortable set of itchy laced, painfully wired, and stretchy undersized lingerie just for the sake of pleasing their eyes? Whoever invented those padded, sculptured, strapless, backless, integrated (?!) bras was not a women. Ask any women what she wants from her bra? Just one simple thing: don’t want to feel it’s there. That translates as “comfortable”, duh! Not under-over or cross- wired - that hurts; not with prickly lace – that itches; not squeezy, pushy or any other kind of deformation of the natural assets. Find me one good argument that I should choose my bra based on the criteria of “what looks alluring to a man”…thank you very much, but if a man needs a sexy lingerie to appreciate his women, you better find the one who has no problem with imagination...
OK, now I’ve exceeded my rantability limits, so I’ll stop. And this has nothing to do with the workload in the office and extra chores around the house and the fact that it was so hot&humid today again that I've almost melted down. And if it is only witches that melt, then I must be the one then.
aBRAcadaBRA! [* waves her black magic at those of you who dared to doubt she is the one]
Perhaps men aren’t that stupid after all and sometimes accidentally do things that make sense. Take for example remembering birthdays and anniversaries. Indeed, why would anyone need to remember them? What kind of celebration is that? If anyone should celebrate that should be men, not women. Just to think of it: in his youth man has his mom to feed him, clean after him and run his business diary. When man married, he’s got his wife to feed him, clean after him and run his business diary for him. Plus a fringe benefit to the package - sex for free on demand…if he’s smart enough to negotiate, that is. So what exactly changed for a man when he’s got married? Nothing. Why would he need to remember the day it happened? No apparent reason, apparently… Take women on the other hand: once married, they loose their freedom, loose their admirers, loose shape and sometimes mind and generally stop having fun…they’ve got new responsibilities and a bundle(s) of joy on their hands. Of course we do remember the day we signed our slavery contract! What I can’t understand – why celebrate this? It’s the same as when on life sentence, you’d celebrate your first day of prison term… “well done, my dear, you’ve managed to live through yet another year around me…happy anniversary and will you please do something about that laundry - I need a clean shirt…” Honestly, sometimes it is better when they are not around so that they can forget the date and get away with this easily…
OK, forget the men, but I do need another subject to rant on…just because I feel like it today, you know. So I went to buy me a present. Retailer therapy. Which in my case usually achieves completely opposite results. It makes me MAD! In the most mean way as well. So when I was back into the office this afternoon, people learned to hide away off my way. Huh. I didn’t know what to buy. So I bought a bra. I just have to rant about this. Isn’t it ironic, that women do buy bras for the eyes of a man? Who is the most interested in ladies bras? Who can’t help staring at ladies bosoms at every opportunity? Who wants to tuck their women into the most uncomfortable set of itchy laced, painfully wired, and stretchy undersized lingerie just for the sake of pleasing their eyes? Whoever invented those padded, sculptured, strapless, backless, integrated (?!) bras was not a women. Ask any women what she wants from her bra? Just one simple thing: don’t want to feel it’s there. That translates as “comfortable”, duh! Not under-over or cross- wired - that hurts; not with prickly lace – that itches; not squeezy, pushy or any other kind of deformation of the natural assets. Find me one good argument that I should choose my bra based on the criteria of “what looks alluring to a man”…thank you very much, but if a man needs a sexy lingerie to appreciate his women, you better find the one who has no problem with imagination...
OK, now I’ve exceeded my rantability limits, so I’ll stop. And this has nothing to do with the workload in the office and extra chores around the house and the fact that it was so hot&humid today again that I've almost melted down. And if it is only witches that melt, then I must be the one then.
aBRAcadaBRA! [* waves her black magic at those of you who dared to doubt she is the one]